Hello, my name is sally. I have a quick question for you. I was raped four years ago. I never Told the police, or sought any therapy for it. I was so trashed at a party, and it just happened I guess. Anyway, I've come to terms with it, but recently I have been unable to be sexually satisfied unless I imagine that I'm either raping someone or being raped. I know for a fact that I didn't enjoy what happened, and I'm starting to have nightmares again. What do I do.
Ben's Answer:
Trauma can show up years after the fact - even with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. You're seeing clear signs that you need to do some work on this trauma in order to release it, or it is likely to have an increasingly negative effect on your life.
Psychotherapy of all kinds can be very helpful for this - simply talking to someone about it - but you would make the fastest progress and probably get the most relief from using techniques like EMDR or EFT/Meridian Tapping. Having used both, I personally feel EFT is easier and faster, and you can learn to use it for yourself, whereas EMDR is meant to be done with a therapist; However with an unresolved rape trauma, it is usually best, at least at first, to work with a therapist, just in case some unexpected emotion arises. It is better to feel safe and secure and not overwhelmed by feelings, or previously buried memories.
Take Care,
Ben Schwarcz, MFT
Santa Rosa Psychotherapist
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