You recommended that I should speak to an adult about how I felt... Actually today my teacher saw me standing alone during the school break and she started asking me if I was OK and she said that I don't participate in class anymore - but I put a smile on my face and said that everything was fine. She answered back, saying "Are you sure? If you continue in this mood I won't leave you" (I think meaning she would ask again).
I had been thinking it over even before you suggested it. I thought of opening up to her but I don't know whether I can trust her or not.. I don't want her to tell my parents.
I tried opening up before but right after it, I had these feelings of extreme anxiety about whether this person would tell my parents. The last thing I want is for them to know, they can't know at all, they are absolutely clueless about this because I don't show my feelings at home. I try to suppress them. I'm afraid they may find out about this.
It's not that often that a teacher goes out of her way to talk to a student about their feelings because they notice they look sad or depressed. You're lucky to have a teacher that notices you're in pain. Why not take a chance. You can decide how much to tell her. It's not a crime to be sad!
If there are certain things you're not ready to share with your teacher, then call a hotline to talk about those things. But, having a face to face relationship with a caring teacher would be a valuable thing.