I am in my early-teen years, I have very frequent mood swings accompanied by the signs of teen depression. Most of the time I am really depressed but for no reason at all, sometimes I have impulses to kill myself - just impulses. I get furious and enormous rage for the simplest reason like my brother just asking for something repetitively...
Before (about a year ago), I had no friends, no self-esteem, no nothing. But recently I transfered classes and started having friends and enjoying myself, that's when I started to have these depressed feelings. I just feel that it is strange that just when things are starting to get better,I start having these emotions.I am so confused.
Is this the normal maturing process or is it depression??
Sometimes when things are going badly for a long time, and we're feeling alone with our problems and nobody to confide in, it all comes to the surface when we finally have someone to talk to.
If you now have friends and your situation looks better, you might feel a strong need to express all those old, hurt feelings that you've bottled up for so long. Maybe it doesn't come easily, because you've felt alone for so long. Everyone needs someone to talk to. You have to find someone you trust enough to talk about your true feelings with.
If you really are having thoughts or impulses to harm yourself, or if you continue to have sudden episodes of rage, please talk to your parents, or a counselor or therapist about it. You can also call a confidential Suicide Hotline day or night, just to talk to a friendly, supportive adult (it's really okay to just use them for someone to talk to). Try 1-800-SUICIDE or check out the long list of Free Help Lines and Hotlines on this site.
Talking to someone will help you to see things more clearly, and understand your feelings better.