Mother Son Discord

by BJ
(Palm Coast, FL, USA)

I am a 46 divorced mother (3 years ago) I left their dad when they were 17 & 20. Both were hurt but communicative during this process. They stayed with their dad and as the years have gone by, without jobs, post high school education, etc., they have refused to return my calls, voice mails, text messages and e-mails. (the world of MySpace and FaceBook has allowed them to block me). I have always been there and had the door open. I invite them to come to my house or go places with me and they say "I'll get back with you" Three years later, nothing. I think it has to do with my ex husband and PAS (Parent Alienating Syndrome) and I feel so alone without them.

Ben's Answer:
This is a very sad situation. Unfortunately this happens fairly often in divorce. You can't force them to change. All you can do is deal with your own feelings of grief and loss.

Meridian Tapping/EFT is one of the best ways I know to resolve feelings of grief and heartbreak. It's important to do this mostly for yourself and not to change anyone else... but often the result of making that emotional/energetic shift, is that those people that you had discord with automatically change with you. We are all connected. By helping and healing ourselves, we allow others to heal with us - especially those we're closest to.

Sometimes by truly letting go of someone, we make it easier for them to come back to us.

Wishing you Peace,
Ben Schwarcz, MFT
Santa Rosa Psychotherapist

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