Fear of Growing Anger and Rage
I'm a 49-year-old female diagnosed Bipolar 1, Borderline Personality Disorder, and PTSD. I've been off and on a multitude of medications but want/need a healthy alternative. I'm an ultra-rapid cycler but tend to be manic - very manic. My mania usually manifests itself as intense energy, speaking and moving quickly, just being very hyper and getting a lot done. But lately I find that energy becoming a growing anger. I seem to be on a constant state of alert - waiting for trouble.
I've been involved in two minor road-rage situations recently and I've had verbal arguments with people (strangers included) about the smallest things. It's like the safety valve has been removed. I'm putting myself in dangerous situations and I don't seem to be concerned about the possible consequences. What happened to the happy manic?
I just purchased your book and audio recordings and am determined to get started today. I'm desperate to find a more peaceful environment within myself. How quickly can these methods begin working? These cycles are so tiring - physically and emotionally. Is meditation the key to calming this growing internal chaos?
Thank you for being out there for us.
Regardless of what other issues (such as Bipolar) may be a factor - resolving emotional trauma will always yield the most benefits. When there are old traumas, there are triggers that can cause rage, anxiety, depression or rapid mood changes. Tapping can be extremely effective with those issues. However, it is important to not overdo it, to go slow and not overwhelm yourself. Take on issues one at a time; keep them specific and work through each one completely, without leaving it half-done. With complex trauma, it is sometimes important to work with a therapist or EFT practitioner to guide you. Meditation is extremely helpful for the issues you're dealing with because it trains you to detach yourself from identifying only with your emotions and to get some distance from your own mind; also to learn to accept and tolerate strong emotional states, without reacting to them or becoming overwhelmed by them. Persistence and self-acceptance are the keys to success.
Ben Schwarcz, MFT
Santa Rosa Psychotherapist
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