I've been feeling really empty lately and I have no one to talk to. My parents think that I have everything in the world and that I should feel happy but I don't. I don't have any close friends because I have trouble making them. I feel very alone. I tend to get left out of social activities and left out of conversations. I spend all day in my room reading because I have nothing else better to do or anywhere to go. I cry all the time and I am really starting to hate myself and wish I was better. I don't know what to do. No one will listen.

Ben's Answer:

It's so important to have someone to talk to -even if it's just one person. It can make all the difference - and help you put things in perspective, and also help you to like yourself again. Being involved in some sort of activity (something that you're genuinely interested in), with other people is one of the best ways to make new friends. If you stay isolated with your books, nobody has any chance to meet you. This is true at any age. Whether a person spends their days at school, or at work, if they're not feeling confident socially, they may not connect with anyone. So if that's your only social contact and the rest of the time is spent alone, at home - you really cut yourself off from the world.

Talking to a therapist can be a helpful stepping stone. Just to have the experience of talking openly with someone who wont judge you, can be a huge relief and boost your confidence.

You could also call a Free Helpline (there's a page on this site with listings). They're confidential, free, and you don't have to be suicidal to call them. It's just a friendly voice to talk to when you have nobody else who can listen.

Don't give up. You're not alone.

Take Care,
Ben Schwarcz, MFT
Santa Rosa Psychotherapist

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