Becoming the Messiah
by Julie Skaf
I was sitting at a table on my back patio studying many different religous beliefs around the world. I was currently reading about the Torah and Judaism when I heard the Athan or call to prayer for Islams. We have this software on our computer that plays the Athan 5 times a day. I opened the slider door to find that the Athan was not playing and I asked my husband if the Athan was on and he said "No". When I told him I heard it loud and clear he said it was good luck. This was the begining of my journey into another level of conciousness. I began reading about conspiracy theories surrounding 9/11 and while watching David Icke talk about the Illuminati a rare experience occured. It was like a flash of light and I was suddenly able to know all things and speak all languages, it was absolute bliss, intense, and ended in about a few seconds. I craved that light of knowledge and was left confused and bewildered as to what had just happened to me. After this I went through a period of needing very little sleep and meditating for hours at a time. I saw beatiful scenes in my meditations and one time hear the waterful rushing that I saw. I realized the state of affairs that this world was in and became upset over the wars being fought. Life seem to becom one big race and my thoughts began to race and my speech became very rapid as I changed the subject continuously.
One day after meditating on allowing God to enter my mind and energy running up my spine and out the top of my head. It seemed as though my mind split open and my awareness expanded. I heard a very loud voice speak to me and I asked "Who are you?", the voice replied, "GOD!" I fell to my knees and shook my head, it couldn't be. This is impossible! Hearing a voice in my head was also impossible. Not sure what to think I asked, "Who am I?" the voice answered, "Jesus" Again I shook my head in disbelief that I could be anyone so great. I went into my bathroom and hen I looked in the mirror I saw an image overlaying my face that was of a man resembling Jesus. This creeped me out at first and I wondered why I was seeing and hearing things. The voice continued to speak to me as I went outside and gave me another vision. I saw the earth and it was all on fire like the sun a large fireball. I cried and shouted for it not to be true. The voice said it didn't have to happen and that I could help, but I must be willing to sacrifice myself to save the worl. I said, Why would I help theses people after what they did?" I argued and struggled with the thought and decided to save the world under one condition. As long as I could be with my true love in the afterlife. The voice left me with two guardians who told me I would write a great book when I'm in my 40's. When I walked down the street and saw the birds in the tree I was able to communicate with them. They could understand my thoughts and began helping me on my journey. The animals are part of Gods kingdom and the kingdom had arrived. The animals were psychic and there were many spirits good and bad. I began to see shadows and was informed not to be afraid of te dark ones since they too are part of the creation.
I felt a great sense of fear and paranoia that people were after me because they know who I am and they would try to kil me. I knew that there was a group of people that would shelter me and protect me since they knew who I was. I knew this was an emergency and I must go to the hospital and they would be there waiting for me. When my husband came home I made a scene and begged him to take me to the hospital. He did not comply and later my mother took me to the doctors whom told me to go to the hospital. I went to the hospital and they asked me questions and asked if I would like to join them voluntarily. I thought I was going to join their staff as a healer and said yes. The next thing I know they were giving me medication and I was put in a locked down facility. When I ate their food I had the ability of sensing if there were chemicals or unhealthy ingredients in the food and would not eat the tainted items. I would add up numbers and each number and color had a significant meaning. I chose my wardrobe according to what I wanted to say with the color.
After they let me out and I went home and my entire world was upside down. It was difficult to return to work knowing what I know knew. I knew there was more to this world than meets the eye and there is a part of us the is pure spirit and conciousness. We have the ability to tap into ancient knowledge and a silent form of communication. There is no such thing as a coincidence it is already written. I soon became very depressed in my life and felt out of place. I was diagnosed as being Bi-Polar with Psychosis. I feel they misdiagnosed me and that I had a spiritual experience that was a roller coaster. At any rate I have stayedon the medication and was hospitalised again 2 years later for having another "manic" episode. The second time was also very spiritual in nature and I felt a sense of timelessness and experienced 3 other spirits within me. I was taught by these spirits that they can enter people but not control them. They taught me many things, but according to this society it's all non-sense and I'm just crazy. Sometime I long for another manic episode since I felt so powerful and in tune with the subtle side of this material world. I just don't want to go to the hospital again. I wish there was a safe place for me when I experience these different levels of conciousness or when I go nuts. I still don't fully understand what happened to me and why it happend. Furthermore I am not sure about what to do with the experience. It has been 2 years since I have had an episode. We shall see what the future holds.