9-Year Old with a Diaper Fetish


(CA)

Hello, I am a 38 yr old mother of a 9yr old boy who has had a fixation with diapers since he was 4 or 5. 2 years ago I discovered the websites that discuss diaper fetishes. I believe that my son possibly is dealing with this. I have been very supportive, never judging, and have provided him with diapers when he has asked for them. It is clear that he struggles with the urges that he has. He tries to make the thoughts of them leave his mind but sometimes they are very strong and he ends up giving into the urges. He tells me he doesn't know why he likes them, other than they are comfortable and cozy. He has no interest in soiling them and never wears them out of his bedroom. I have explained to him that God has made us all different and we all deal with different issues, so their is nothing to feel shame about, although I told him that it is something that we will need to keep private because his friends may not understand his struggle.


I have spent countless hours online reading about this condition but have not found any sources of help. My husband and I spoke to a psychiatrist about 1.5 years ago and he was not aware of the condition and wanted to talk to him about giving him some exercises to help replace the thoughts. At the time my son was so young, I was concerned about him having to talk to someone else about the issue so I did not follow through. He has recently shared with me that he is willing to talk to a doctor to help him with his thoughts.

If there is help for his age and this problem what would you suggest? I have thought of hypnotherapy but really don't know how to go about finding help for him. He is so young and this could impact him for all his life. I look forward and appreciate your insight.

Ben's Answer:

First I should say, it sounds like you've handled this issue with great compassion and sensitivity. Your son is lucky to have such supportive parents.

Your son could probably benefit from simply talking to a therapist weekly - a person that he can really come to trust and confide in. Just talking to a trusted, non-judging adult, besides his parents, could be very helpful. The only possible down side of that, is that you don't want to reinforce or suggest that there is something wrong with him. Some kids will accept seeing a therapist with little or no urging or explanation, while others may question it, and assume it means they have a serious problem.

But the first thing I would try is EFT/Meridian Tapping. EFT is a technique that you can learn to use yourself, and then use on your son (teaching him to use it on his own in the process). This might help you to avoid seeing a professional altogether. Since your son is able to talk openly about the issue with you already, using EFT would be especially easy, and might even free him of this obsession in a matter of minutes. Using EFT, the chances of success are excellent.


You can learn more about EFT here:

Learn the Basic EFT Technique

You could also arrange a phone session with me and I can advise you specifically on suggestions for using EFT for your son's issue.

Take Care,
Ben Schwarcz, MFT
Santa Rosa Psychotherapist

Comments for 9-Year Old with a Diaper Fetish

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Oct 05, 2017
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I hope I can help, I am a Clinical Psychologist NEW
by: TheShaman

First let me say, unequivocally that there is absolutely NO connection between adult baby or diaper lovers and pedophilia. Diaper fetishism and "infantalism" (adult babies in other words) have long been discriminated against due to ignorance and misunderstanding. When I was growing up I struggled with my own desire to wear diapers, and hated myself for it. Let me say from experience that if you try to shame your son for his proclivities it will merely strengthen then and drive them down, deeper into his psyche. As a result of my self hatred I became a suicidal alcoholic (no joke). Finally I sobered up and got a Masters degree in clinical psychology so I could help other such as myself. Please be both understanding and patient with your son. I have always wondered why it seems ok for a person to be OBSESSED with women’s FEET (Quentin Tarantino has this fetish) but if the familiar crinkle of a diaper is what one is drawn to, one is ridiculed... it seems very arbitrary to discriminate against any harmless fetish. Adult babies are statistically some of the LEAST likely to become sexual predators. Keep that in mind and do research at an actual library. Do not trust pop psychologists.
Good luck, sincerely!

Oct 05, 2017
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I can understand your trepidation... NEW
by: Anonymous

First let me say, unequivocally that there is absolutely NO connection between adult baby or diaper lovers and pedophilia. Diaper fetishism and "infantalism" (adult babies in other words) have long been discriminated against due to ignorance and misunderstanding. When I was growing up I struggled with my own desire to wear diapers, and hated myself for it. Let me say from experience that if you try to shame your son for his proclivities it will merely strengthen then and drive them down, deeper into his psyche. As a result of my self hatred I became a suicidal alcoholic (no joke). Finally I sobered up and got a Masters degree in clinical psychology so I could help other such as myself. Please be both understanding and patient with your son. I have always wondered why it seems ok for a person to be OBSESSED with women’s FEET (Quentin Tarantino has this fetish) but if the familiar crinkle of a diaper is what one is drawn to, one is ridiculed... it seems very arbitrary to discriminate against any harmless fetish. Adult babies are statistically some of the LEAST likely to become sexual predators. Keep that in mind and do research at an actual library. Do not trust pop psychologists.
Good luck, sincerely!

Sep 25, 2017
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Bedwetting family NEW
by: Anonymous

After reading what has been said here I can see plainly what issues are presented and find myself in a state of wondering what might happen in our family. My SIL and brother have 4 children that wet the bed as did my SIL until the age of 12. After a lot of medical testing and so forth my SIL and brother were told that the kids are all perfectly normal but that a hormone that governs this is slow to develop in their kids. The oldest now 12 has only very recently stopped. But the other 3 a boy and 2 girls continue to wet their beds nightly. After much trial and error it was decided to use cloth diapers and plastic pants as the cost of a disposable product for all 4 was through the roof. I now wonder if these kids will develop a fetish as mentioned here. The parents have been wonderful in helping the kids understand that the bedwetting is not their fault and that it will pass and the kids all seem to accept that fact along with wearing diapers and plastic pants in bed.

Jun 29, 2017
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One Thing Is Clear
by: Bottlebaby

When I read your comment one thing became very clear, You Are The Worst Kind Of Coward.
Yes, I am an Adult Baby. I was born that way. But that one facit of my identity did not and still does not control me or limit my actions and choices.
I am a Vietnam Era veteran who served for 6 years in the US Army and have an Honorable Discharge.
I spent 8 years moving carnival rides in a climate where snow and sleet are common.
Both of those occupations are male dominate and any kind of deviation from the sexual norm will, not could, WILL lead to an extended stay in the nearest hospital.
I have not spent my life in fear of being discovered the way you have because I have sufficient self confidence and judgment to know who to trust with the knowledge that I am AB and who not to tell.
Being an Adult baby is only one small part of my life and my personality the same way it is for every other emotionally mature male that is an Adult Baby and / or a Homosexual and / or enjoys being Spanked or Paddled and / or CBT and / or Sissification and / or Feminization among other alternative forms of pleasure at their sexual core.
My advise to you is to stop whining, grow up and try living.
My advise to the parents of an AB child is to encourage the child to learn, to explore, to try new things and to have fun. My own research and lots of conversations at various functions for, "Littles" is that the majority or AB's have an IQ that is higher then average.
In the 1970's one of my friends had two little boys who spent more time with me then with their Mom because she had substance abuse problems. During those years my policy was to reward the effort not the results. You don't have to win, you don't have to succeed, what you do have to do is put forth your best effort at whatever it is you decide to do.

Jun 23, 2017
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Don't support the diaper fetish
by: Anonymous

First I am some one with a diaper fetish, so this is not a I don't understand it, so it bad post, I fully know about diaper fetish, I am stuck in it.

So why do I say don't support it? (I am not saying don't support him, he needs all the support he can get) I say don't support it because it is a burden, as much as it is an addiction. I am in my 40's and I know most people will not understand and many might even think it is something it is not. so I have to live with it as a secret that I fear that some one might find out, I live in dread of that day, I am afraid to have friends over, so there is the isolation of it. I know I can never have a room mate (to split the cost of rent) because of it. I can never date for fear that a gf would find out.

He has not hit puberty so it should not be sexual now, and if he still suffers from it after hitting puberty it will be so ingrained that he will never be rid of it.

May 18, 2017
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I've had the same case as many future ABDLs.
by: John Constantinides

I developed a diaper fetish when I was 11 years old. My parents weren't supportive enough to understand my fantasies until they discovered some useful informations about paraphilic infantiilsm across the Web. My first experience with disposables came after my mom bought a red box of daytime Pampers with the quilted cushion lining for my eldest brother in the early 1980s. In the house we had also a bunch of Swedish snibbs that I particularly liked for the sensual arousal I got from the smooth plastic.

Finally I decided to switch on adult briefs as I was too big enough to fit into baby disposables. When I saw P&G also make adult diapers I took the chance to find a bag of Attends wrap-around briefs with wetness indicators and baby blue plastic backing on a local store. They were so cute!

I had to wait three decades before starting to wear diapers in my adulthood.

Apr 20, 2017
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Adding Facts To The Wearing Diapers Talk
by: Adult Toddler

I can only speak for myself on this. I am emotionally and sexually submissive and the only kind of relationship I want is a Female Led Relationship {FLR} with being "Dominated And Diapered," at the core.

For nearly 40 years I did side line consulting with people that wanted to be Dominatrix, Fantasy Coach, or run a BDSM Business. Someone has to know how to set up an LLC, get a federal tax number, deal with the accounting and taxes, write the back stories, oversee the web site creation, organize advertising and teach ladies how to be successful with the more tender sessions.

There are Brunches for, "Littles," meaning AB and age players every month in Atlanta, Seattle, San Francisco etc. and I have been to many of them over 25 years. What I have learned by experience is that when it comes to Infantilism, a desire to be a baby White males with high IQ predominate. Every AB I have met from Seattle to Tampa fit in that category.
Most of us at some point, usually mid to late teens, myself included, become dues paying members of Mensa. As adults we tend to be college educated and are engineers such as software or microelectronic or are in upper management or, like me, self employed and loved the scramble. I worked in communications and satellites.

Long before we are old enough to orgasm we have desires to take a bottle, suck a pacifier, sleep in a crib, to be diapered and cuddled more then most children.

The only issue will be is the desire recessive or dominate. If the need to be a baby is dominate then it also becomes the core of the male's sexual identity. Usually this leads to issues when the AB starts thinking about dating but that may be changing as communications systems evolve way past what I grew up with.

An AB who's desire recessive have far less problems with relationships and easily feel Love, get married, have children and stable families.
Every AB I have met that is married have the kind of marriage (read: Communication with their wife) where they can talk about their emotional desires and find ways to have the need for diapers and domination satisfied, if not by their wife (more the fool she is if she can't be Mommy) there is a HUGE industry for Pro Mommies and engineers make very good money. Every single married AB I have met are also very a loving and patient Daddy. Being a parent requires emotional maturity and is in no way connected to sexual identity.

Adult Babies are not in any way perverted nor are they a perversion What we are is secretive for many good reasons.
If you and your baby are at a social gathering with friends or neighborhood Bar-B-Q and the conversation turns to cuddle and sex you can't just say, "Well the only way I can get an erection is to have, "Mommy" put me in diapers and cuddle me with a bottle."

NOW THAT'S A REAL CONVERSATION STOPPER IF EVER THERE WAS ONE!

Being an Adult Baby is a lot more common then you would think.
How can I say there are a lot of Adult Babies? Go to E-Bay and put Adult Baby in the search bar or just use this link.

http://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_from=R40&_trksid=p2050601.m570.l1313.TR1.TRC0.A0.H0.Xadult+baby.TRS0&_nkw=adult+baby&_sacat=0

I have seen a couple comments here that say their child, in one case a 9 year old, wants to experience both wet and dirty diapers. My experience has been that any mention of scatological involvement is a sign of psychosis and the parent may want to look into concealing for the child.
More often, however, statements with a scatological content is just the fantasy of the writer. Someone who is emotionally immature and looking to invoke a shock value. Ignore them, ban them from the site if you can.

Apr 20, 2017
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Good luck
by: Anonymous

I think it is perfectly normal for a 8 year old to be in a diaper I used to be in a diaper at that age and went to Pull-Ups and good nights if he ever does go to school in a diaper just have underwear over it and good luck

Mar 09, 2017
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It Is Not A Choise
by: Adult Toddler

Your son's desire to be diapered, maybe even treated like a baby and cuddled while Mommy gives him a bottle is not a choice he gets to make.
I am over 60 and involved in a variety of fetish needs for more then 40 years. The one thing that seems to be true is that your son had no more choice about wanting to be diapered then he did when it comes to the color of his eyes or hair or sexual orientation or if he wants to be a girl. It is not his choice to make.
The good news, the really good news is that he feels so loved and secure that he is talking to his parents about his desires. That almost never happens. You are a total stranger to me and i am still proud of you for being such a successful parent.
Please, DO NOT spend a single cent on, "counseling," or "treatment," your son is not sick. Anyone that says he needs a psychologist is the kind of snake oil selling pimp that says he is an expert at curing homosexuality.
Psychosexual Infantilism if you want the fancy name is far more common then you know. To prove it, just go to Ebay and put, "Adult Baby" in the search bar.You will get more then 83,000 individual items for adult babies.
If it was my child or grand child I would talk to him and slowly wiggle all his desires out of him that have diapers at the core. Baby Bottle, pacifier, TV more suited to preschool age, wear baby clothes designed to fit him and then decided what you will and will not openly support.
I wish I could follow this but I do not see a way to keep in touch.

Mar 08, 2017
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Diapered too
by: Anonymous

This started for me after a few days at my aunts, it was my birthday and got to go over to my aunts for a few days because she has a pool. My mom dropped me off and I would be picked up on Sunday. When I first got there all I could think of was getting to swim in pool, my aunt let me go right away. I put my cut off jeans on for swim trunks and was in the pool, when I was called in for supper I was to go dry off and get changed. What I didn't think of is I didn't take my underwear of to go in pool, so we I went to put my pants back on the underwear were wet. Well after eating supper and I got up my cousin seen my pants were wet, it was because of underwear but when I left the kitchen she told my aunt I wet my pants and could see my chair was wet to. My aunt came in the living room and told me to standup, I said what? she just she needs me to standup, when I do she put her hand on the back of my pants and says you wet your pants, I said no it was my underwear. My aunt says your pants were wet and your sitting on the couch. Next thing is my cousin coming in the living room and say to my aunt, here is the diaper. My aunt say she needs wipes and powder too. I told my aunt I didn't wet my pants and she say they sure do feel wet. My aunt then unfolds a changing pad and says to come over to her, I said I don't want a diaper, she says little boys with wet pants in this house wear diapers and then my cousin is back and says here's the baby wipes and powder. My aunt says over here now or you'll get a spanking too. As my aunt laid me down on the floor I started crying and saying I don't want a diaper. My aunt took my pants and under wear off and then she used the baby wipes, and said hold still so I can clean you up. Then it happened I felt her grab my ankles and lift my legs up and she put the diaper under me, when she let my legs down I could feel the diaper. I again said I don't want a diaper, and my aunt says well you shouldn't have wet your pants. My aunt was then putting the powder on me and put the diaper on, as she stood me up I seen my cousin sitting there watching and I grabbed my pants, my aunt took them and said those are wet. I said I wanted my pants and my aunt said for to go sit back down on the couch. My aunt left the room with my pants and my cousin said I didn't know she was going to put a baby diaper on you, I just told her it looked like pants were wet and she told me to go get a diaper for you. My aunt came back in the room and I asked where were my pants? She said little boys in diapers don't need pants, so I can check them to see if their wet. My aunt left the room and went back in kitchen, my cousin looked at me and says your diaper has Elmo on it, I looked down and she says from Sesame Street. I was getting upset and she smiled and says don't cry the baby diapers will keep you dry. I sat there mad at her and tried to watch TV. My aunt came back in and sat down to watch TV too.

Feb 07, 2017
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Why a boy becomes a Diaper Lover CONTINUED
by: Jason

5 year old going through it NEW
by: Anonymous

I came across this blog after googling "how to deal with child wanting diapers'. In the beginning my heart dropped reading that my son may have this "thing". I don't know how to label it and I am not sure where he falls in this DL/ AB world. Maybe its too soon say.

What I am reading is that he will Not grow out of this-which ok, taking a big breathe. Also it sounds like I detached from my son too soon...? As long as I can remember 6-8mos old he wanted to do everything himself. At times I felt unneeded. Now I am reading it could be me that is making him feel like this. I am starting to blame myself. I recall losing his blankie on a flight at 3 years old- did losing that trigger it?

My son as of today urinated in 2 pulls-ups. Now he wants to poop in it. This has all happened within the last 24 hours. Do I let him? He also loves to collect underwear but does not wear them on a daily level. He only likes to wear them through play.
When we go to the stores he begs for diapers. We have purchased 4 bags of pull ups to date.

Deep down I do want to know why he is doing this? A

I admit after reading the entries on this blog I can sort of breathe easier. Thank you for all that wrote unfiltered, raw and just genuine. I still need guidance on how to deal with this.

I read a lot of entries of wearing diapers but he actually wants to do Number 1 and 2 in it. Do we let him? Do we continue to buy him pull-ups? Lastly, I hope i didn't offend anyone and I hope this entry didn't confuse you. Its all fresh and all happening right now. HELP!


Why A boy becomes a Diaper Lover "CONTINUED"

In my previous post "WHY A BOY BECOMES A DIAPER LOVER". Please read it first. I tried to explain just how this comes about and to relieve some of the fears. I think I need to add a little more in reference to my post.

First when it comes to the child and or the parent do not try to label either. This is not something for either to feel guilty about it is not an illness it is not something that can destroy one’s life. Many people who are DL/TBs - DL/ABs are perfectly normal people. They live perfectly normal lives and raise perfectly normal children. THEY ARE NOT PEDOPHILES.

As a parent do not feel that you share some degree of guilt for this, through my research it is explained as just something that happens. But as a parent you need to understand the importance of accepting that it has happened to your child and that you need to not humiliate the child for it. He or she did not ask for this to happen to them either.

Understand that there are many Pros and Cons to this subject.



As I stated earlier it is a normal thing that does occur in some baby’s development.
It has NOTHING to do with sex. There is no way possible for a baby less than a year old to know anything pertaining to a sexual act. It is only healthy mind development involving the baby’s environment. The baby and or child at a later age is still perfectly normal. Yes perfectly normal!!!

There is no substantiated proof that a DL/TB nor DL/AB cannot live a perfectly normal life, raise children and live happily ever after.

Yes it might be very true that parents worry that they did something wrong with their child and for that reason doing research about why their child likes diapers is important. As I stated in my original post they develop at a very young age the attachment to diapers. It is neither their fault nor, the parents. But it is important for the parent and the child to understand why this came about and how to deal with it.

BUT, thinking that the, falsehoods and untruths spread about by uninformed ignorant people is true, it is very dangerous. Many children have been hurt by the ignorance of uninformed parents.

Yes when children enter puberty they are going to explore many routes. This is certainly a normal part of life in the child’s development of becoming an adult. If a child explores through contact with a diaper it is no more harmful than a pair of underwear in fact it is underwear.

DL/TBs and DL/ABs I stress are NOT pedophiles!!! They are NOT sexual deviates. They are just as normal as anyone else they just like diapers, which is certainly no one else’s business other than the child and his or her parents.

Here are a few more sites that can help inform parents in need.
http://www.wikihow.com/Cope-With-Being-a-Diaper-Lover
http://understanding.infantilism.org/what_...infantilism.php
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Is_it_normal_for...fetish?#slide=1

There are many good sites with good information.
There are many bad sites with bad information. BEWARE!

Remember to keep an open mind and beware there are people who would be totally negative about this subject. They are both ignorant and very detrimental towards the well being of both the child and the parents.

For myself I am not a DL I have to wear for need only. . But through my own experience I do know there is a very negative outlook upon anyone who wears diapers for any reason. That comes from many uninformed ignorant people.

What I am saying here is there are parents who do have children who are DL/TBs through no fault of their own. They did not pick this fate nor did anyone else for them. It is simply something that happened. They are still just as normal as the day is long. They just have a secret.

From the first few minutes of life a baby is put in a diaper and for a number of years thereafter by an adult. Again through no fault of anyone else this desire came about. However for any parent to think this is some crazy thing the child came up with they need to guess again.

I am not promoting nor discouraging the fact that a child is a DL/TB. What I am trying to do is encouraging parents to develop a positive outlook with their child. Do not look down upon them for being a DL/TB. Do not hurt and humiliate them for being a DL/TB. They did not choose this fate but they are the one who has to live with it, for the rest of their life. A good parent will again learn and help their child deal with this in a loving and positive way.

What I'm trying to explain here it is an obsession and they have no control over their situation. It is embedded into their mind so deeply it cannot be changed. Therefore the parent needs to understand that. Yes the child has to deal with it, it is his problem not the parents but the parent can help the child by supporting them and not finding fault with them. They did not ask to be DL/TBs it is just something that happened.

You are right it can and will become a very big part of the child's life but there again if the parent supports the child and helps guide them on how to be discrete and not let it get out of control they can live perfectly normal lives. Have families and live happily ever after.
By not letting it get out of control does not mean keep them from diapers that does not work and can be very dangerous and detrimental. It can cause the child to get them one way or another and not so much in a good way either. Letting the child use the diaper for its intended purpose might not be out of line in private, but keep in mind that it might also be a disservice to the child to allow them to wear around other children and adults.

The important thing here is that the parent needs to make sure that the child understands there is nothing wrong with them and the parent needs to understand that too. A diaper is harmless to anyone. There are many more worse things a child can do than wear a diaper.

Again re read what I posted above and keep an open mind.

Feb 01, 2017
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Reply to Jason
by: Anonymous

Very well put I grew up thinking I was a freak I liked touching and wearing plastic pants and diapers/nappies I felt an outcast until into my 30's and forties and the dawn of the internet I found that I was not alone I had others whom was in the same situation I had children but none of them had this fetish or paraphilia or whatever you wish to call it! I feel relaxed wearing these items I don't use them for their purpose,and they help me sleep better whether it is psychological or not I do I was married before but my ex did not understand me and called me a freak i divorced and years later found a wife whom is understanding and although don't wear such apparel accepts me for who I am I have done some research myself and as Jason says you need to come to terms with this phenomenon or it will consume you! people whom don't have this will be wary of you if they knew this is not about pedophilia In fact I have brought up my own children! and grand children and would be the first to report anyone abusing children!in anyway shape or form ! this phenomenon is about me and the way I cope with stress of the world and being able to relax in a way which some may find strange. how it started with me my earliest recollection was at Puberty putting on a pair of plastic pants and liking the sensation it gave me a sense of comfort the stress simply just seemed to melt away I thought nothing of it until I was older and this urge to wear them became stronger I tried to banish it from my mind but the more I fought against these urges to wear such apparel the more stronger it came back nappies and plastic pants are the normal alternative underwear!. even though I still use a toilet normally!I sometimes do wear ordinary underwear but it is rare so if you have a child/teenager Boy or girl whom shows attention to diapers and plastic pants please be sensitive to them ! it's not their fault they are not a budding pedophile or monster or freak they are human beings trying to make it in this funny world we live in today.

Jan 18, 2017
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5 year old going through it
by: Anonymous

I came across this blog after googling "how to deal with child wanting diapers'. In the beginning my heart dropped reading that my son may have this "thing". I don't know how to label it and I am not sure where he falls in this DL/ AB world. Maybe its too soon say.

What I am reading is that he will Not grow out of this-which ok, taking a big breathe. Also it sounds like I detached from my son too soon...? As long as I can remember 6-8mos old he wanted to do everything himself. At times I felt unneeded. Now I am reading it could be me that is making him feel like this. I am starting to blame myself. I recall losing his blankie on a flight at 3 years old- did losing that trigger it?

My son as of today urinated in 2 pulls-ups. Now he wants to poop in it. This has all happened within the last 24 hours. Do I let him? He also loves to collect underwear but does not wear them on a daily level. He only likes to wear them through play.
When we go to the stores he begs for diapers. We have purchased 4 bags of pull ups to date.

Deep down I do want to know why he is doing this?

I admit after reading the entries on this blog I can sort of breathe easier. Thank you for all that wrote unfiltered, raw and just genuine. I still need guidance on how to deal with this.

I read a lot of entries of wearing diapers but he actually wants to do Number 1 and 2 in it. Do we let him? Do we continue to buy him pull-ups? Lastly, I hope i didn't offend anyone and I hope this entry didn't confuse you. Its all fresh and all happening right now. HELP!

Jan 17, 2017
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daughter wore a diaper to her purity ball
by: carole b.

Last fall,our 15 year old daughter and dad went to a purity ball and she wore a pastel pink ball gown with a flowered head wreath,lace anklets and pink shoes.Of her own accord,she wore a size 8 pampers cruisers diaper with pink plastic pants over it under her dress.She told me she did it to feel more pure and little girlish for daddy and that she read about other teen girls wearing diapers under their purity ball gowns.

Jan 12, 2017
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Me To
by: Anonymous

I also like wearing diapers, I was abused as a kid, and as I am adopted I never saw my real mother. I was constantly bullied at school as well.
Being Epileptic did not help and neither did being autistic.

I am almost certain that I have some form of SPD as I primarily like wearing diapers to poop in. I like the sensation of being poopy. Wetting just goes along side and I don't mind that.

I would say I am more Adult Baby then Diaper Lover, but that said, my Adult Baby Tendincies are not huge either. I like sucking a pacifier, watching disney, and cartoons, drinking baby formula and occasionally (maybe once or twice a year) dressing up as a toddler.

I would love to try breast milk, but that is simply because I want to see what being breast fed is like, pure curiosity.

I would also love to experience being taken care of like a baby by a mummy, again pure curiosity.

But that is pretty much my AB side, I don't play with baby toys, or drink from a baby bottle, I am a Computer Geek, Scifi Fan and a Science Nerd. I play Piano and Guitar and watch movies and listen to music, and that is pretty much my daily activity.

A Child with a diaper fetish while not unusual and perfectly harmless, is cause for concern.
I would try to discourage this, as once he is addicted it is life long, and can lead to depression, suicidal thoughts, self injury, warped self image, self hate, loneliness, isolation and mental health issues such as Bipolar Disorder and other such personality disorders. Being addicted to diapers has destroyed my life.

You will no your child is addicted to them the first time you try to discourage it, his reaction will be strong and very out of character for his normal behavior.

Another concern is Autism, has he been assessed for this, Infantilism (that is the name of Diaper Fetish) seems to be more common in people with High Functioning Autistic Spectrum Disorder.

However wanting diapers is also a trait of Sensory Processing Disorder a side effect of Low Functioning Autism. My Autism is "Pervasive Developmental Disorder Not Otherwise Specified with Traits of Aspergers Syndrome" This means that while I am Primarily High Functioning I also have traits of Low Functioning Autism. Sensory Processing Disorder for Example.

Children with Sensory Processing Disorder are either Hyper sensitive or Hypo sensitive to one or more types of stimuli.
It is worth looking in to this if you have not done so already.

If your son has already become addicted to this, there is nothing you can do, remember he did not choose to be the way he is, all you have to do now is accept it, support him, baby him when he asks (if he asks) and make time to be there for him. You will need to continue this for as long as he asks, (most likely forever) you may find that he begins to experiment with using his diaper as he grows up, accept it and support it, his desire to do so is unconscious and not only is it pervasive but it is also passive. He had no control over his wanting to war a diaper and if he starts using them, he will have no control over that either.
Keep in mind that when I say control I am referring to conscious control over a thought.

the desire to wear and use diapers, comes from deep within the subconscious mind he is not aware of it beyond the face that he likes diapers.

As the Psychiatric Community does not fully understand what they term as Paraphilic Infantilism or Adult Baby Syndrome there is no Psychiatric help that you can get. A Counselor might be useful but only in as much as to help your son accept himself.
I should rephrase that, A Counselor is required to help him accept himself, if this is not done, it will lead to much larger problems that will cause much pain and distress. Depression, Bipolar, Emotionally Unstable Borderline Personality Disorder, Suicidal thoughts etc...etc...

I wish you good luck and Happiness, to both you and your son.
Take Care now
Bye Bye then.

Sep 27, 2016
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You are doing great, keep going!
by: Anonymous

Wow! Wished my mom acted like this... I've been going trough the same thing since the age of 5 and I'm now 33. This is something that can change your life. Finding the right person for you become more complicated since you always wonder if it is the right one who you could talk about this delicate subject. I consider myself very lucky that my wife is fully accepting this with almost no restrictions. I heard that it is impossible to stop it but I never had any confirmation about it. One thing sure, I stopped trying to quit many many years ago. I tryed several times and it always comes back stronger. Now I just consider myself affected by a small mental condition that sometimes requires to wear diapers... and I'm fine with this.

Aug 20, 2016
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Struggles
by: Pete

We all have something we struggle with and I have struggled with this all my life as well and still enjoy wearing after 35+ years of wearing. It is hard to know if this is dangerous to ones self esteem or life as you grow older but I've learned that I need to be honest with myself and to not worry about what others think about you it but to also be respectful of others. Keep him believing in himself and knowing he is a good person and help him talk about feelings that come up with this and letting him know what could be harmful to him or others and I'm sure he will be fine. Life is about getting smarter and being better everyday and those can be accomplished through all struggles! Hope you all have a great life and find happiness in each step.

May 22, 2016
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here is an idea
by: Anonymous

I'm proud of how you handle this, wish my mom handled it better. He says he has no interest in soiling and wetting I think. He never leaves his bedroom if he is wearing a diaper which is fine. I think he is scared to wet or mess his diapers around you and your husband so my suggestion for you and ur husband have him wear them in the living room, encourage him to do so to help prove to him even more that it's ok to be different. Baby him as much as you can

Apr 27, 2016
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Diaper fetish
by: Anonymous

I know what this young man is going through. It also happen to me at the age of 11. It sounds like your a good parent, and you did look into it. When this happen to me there was no internet, so it was very confusing for me. And my parents got a divorce the same time this was going on. I hate to tell you this but once this happens it's very hard to get away from, and yes I did go see a doctor, but was told it was ok to be the way I was,
I just turned 55 today, and I still love to ware diapers. I never stopped liking them.

Apr 23, 2016
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14 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER WEARING DIAPERS
by: Rita C

My daughter is 14 and her best friend mandi,whos also 14 is a bedwetter and wears cloth diapers and plastic pants[rubberpants] to bed every night.When the daughter sleeps over at mandi's house,she wears the cloth diapers and rubberpants also to be like mandi.Now mandi has given the daughter some of her cloth diapers and three pairs of her rubberpants and the daughter has been wearing them to bed even tho she doesnt need them! when i asked her why she is wearing them,she just told me that they make her feel cute and babyish and that since mandi has to wear them every night,she is also!I dont know if i should let her keep on wearing them or take them away from her.

Ben's Reply:

While I have no judgement or disrespect towards anyone who wears adult diapers and people should be free to do as they please if it hurts nobody else... this is a situation where your daughter is simply wanting to be like her friend. Most 14 year olds want to be like their friends, but it doesn't mean that they should always do as their friends do. I would caution you strongly about allowing or fostering this practice for your daughter. While it's not likely that she would become addicted or attached to wearing diapers, why take the risk?
If this was my child, I would tell her it's okay that she tried it, and it's kind of her that she has this solidarity with her friend, but this is not something that you can support. If she likes feeling "cute and babyish" then suggest to her that you have a special evening each week, where you can baby her - make her favorite childhood treat, watch some cartoons, wrap her in a blanket and cuddle with her on the couch. This would be a much better way to help meet those emotional needs.

Best Wishes,
Ben

Dec 19, 2015
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Why a boy becomes a Diaper Lover
by: Jason

Why a boy becomes a Diaper Lover
Hi I wrote this post for parents and their sons to understand why they like diapers.
Hope it helps.
DL /TB is the acronym for Diaper Lover/ Teen Baby.
I remember reading years ago that DL/TB is a fetish. Keep an open mind here it is. But it is developed when the child is young. I remembered them being as young as five. After talking with another parent I went back and read over again the information and found it is earlier than that. Much earlier in fact it is in infancy.
First DL is a sexual fetish a TB is a Paraphilia. STOP! Do not be frightened by these two words they are both harmless. Paraphilia is just a derivative of the fetish. In other words a TB is a DL first. The important thing to keep in mind here is that the more you know about why your child is a DL/TB the better parent you will be. Most importantly you need to keep in mind this is not your child's choice. Yes you have questions, do you really think your child does not. He is the one who has to live with it and understand this is a lifelong thing and the more you know the more you can both help each other.
Read carefully: Psychological Origins and Development and especially about the Transitional Object and Behaviorism. Keep in mind when they are referring to the term sexual here they are talking about mind development not an act. And, understand that the "Transitional object’ is the diaper and that the ‘Behaviorism’ is the changing of that diaper.
Early psychology assumed that fetishism either is being conditioned or imprinted or the result of a strong emotional (possibly traumatic) or physical experience. Often, these experiences occurred in early childhood. For example, an individual who has been physically abused could either have a sexual obsession with intercourse, or they could be completely terrified by even the idea of being touched. Physical factors like genetic disposition are another common possible explanation. In the following, the most important theories are presented in chronological order:
Alfred Binet suspected fetishism was the pathological result of associations. Accidentally simultaneous presentation of a sexual stimulus and an inanimate object, he argued, led to the object being permanently connected to sexual arousal.
In 1951, Donald Winnicott presented his theory of transitional objects and phenomena, according to which childish actions like thumb sucking and objects like cuddly toys are the source of manifold adult behavior, amongst many others fetishism.[8]
The use of a transitional object in infancy is a healthy experience (Winnicott, 1953). To understand the origin of a fetish object and of fetishism, the infant’s use of the transitional object and of transitional phenomena in general must be studied (Winnicott, 1953).
In his article ‘Transitional objects and phenomena’, Winnicott says about fetish: "Fetish can be described in terms of a persistence of a specific object or type of object dating from infantile experience in the transitional field, linked with the delusion of a maternal phallus" (Winnicott, 1953). In other words, a specific object or type of object, dating from an experience during the period where the mother gradually pulls back as an immediate provider of satisfaction of the child’s desires, persists as a characteristic in adult sexual life.
Before this transitional phase, the child believes that his own wish creates the object of his desire (specifically the qualities of his mother that fulfill his needs), which brings with it a sense of satisfaction. During this phase the child gradually adapts to the (frustrating) realization that the object cannot be controlled to serve the child's needs.
The transitional object is always the result of a gratifying relationship with the mother, specifically with the maternal body. It stands for the satisfying qualities that the object (the mother/ father) of the first relationship the child has. The child adapts to the impact of the realization that the mother is not always there to ‘bring the world to him’ through fantasizing about the object of his desire while using an object (a teddy bear, a piece of cloth). He creates an illusion of the previous object. In relation to the transitional object the infant passes from (magical) omnipotent control to control by manipulation (involving muscle eroticism and co-ordination pleasure).
In opposition to this, the fetish represents the impossibility of pleasure with the body of the mother or the paternal body in the case of females. Fetishism, although less abundant in occurrence in the female psyche, or of a different nature, is not the monopoly of men. The transitional object may eventually develop into a fetish object and so persist as a characteristic of the adult sexual life (Winnicott, 1953). Normally, the child gains from the experience of frustration during the transitional phase, although the infant can be disturbed by a close adaptation to need that is continued too long or is not allowed its natural decrease.

What I’m reading here is that as the mother begins to pull away from total care of the child then the child begins to look at the repeated contact with the (piece of cloth aka the diaper) as the continuation of that bond. And that the repeated changing of the diaper only strengthens that bond. Keep in mind that once this occurs it never goes away. It also seems there is a window of opportunity where this takes place. Which would explain why there are not a lot of kids who are DLs.
What I am also seeing here is that the bond between that mother and that child is so inseparable that any mother who has a child who is a DL has to be crazy to think there is something wrong with their child.
This is just the way I read it.
There is a lot of information online that can help with any fears that you have that your child has a problem they do not.
What I'm saying is there are many parents who get mad when they find out their child likes diapers especially boys. I am trying to explain the reason why that liking comes about. I have worn for many years I do not mind them now but I am not a DL.
In the defense of the child who is and it is not every boy but for those boys who are DLs any parent who gets mad at that child is wrong.
If you read the information I posted it seems very self explanatory if you read it several times.
Or I think it is. At least this is how I read it.
"First it happens in infancy that the baby develops the fetish".
Keep in mind this is not a bad thing many people have a fetish and they are very normal people.
Secondly it happens when the mother begins to break away from caring for the baby's every need and allows the baby to begin to explore on its own in other words allowing the baby to crawl and explore its surroundings. This happens when the baby is only months old.
This is actually a very important part of a baby's development. But there are some babies who want to cling to the mother's bond longer and tend to do so for a period of time until they do eventually begin the exploratory process. These babies therefore develop the fetish or the transitional object as it is called, that being the "teddy bear" or the "piece of cloth aka the diaper" as a continuation of the motherly bond. Not all babies cling to this bond so strongly it is only those that do who develop in this case the diaper fetish or become the DL. This explains why not all boys are DLs.
The fact is these babies are just as normal as any other baby they just are trying to cling to the motherly bond a little longer. That being said that is why any mother who has a boy who is a DL really has nothing to fear he just wanted to keep close to his mother a little longer when he was a baby.
Thirdly when the baby had contact with the mother when this transition took place any time his diaper was changed it only strengthened the fetish that much more. In other words he identified the diaper and the diaper changing as a way of continuing the bond with the mother. The fact that people look at the changing of the baby as a time of bonding is actually stronger than some might think.
I am in no way trying to find fault with nor promoting the fact that some boys are DLs and yes it can possibly lie dormant for years. Or in many cases a child can keep it a secret for many years. Fighting with confusion strife and thinking there is something really wrong with them. When in reality they are just as normal as any other child. Where, one child chooses a teddy bear another a blankie and the other a (piece of cloth aka a diaper.)
What I'm saying here is that parents who are not aware of this fact need to learn to understand why it happens and accept it, "Because it will never go away". They need to understand it is developed through a sense of love and a sense of need a sense of security in infancy.
To go just a slight bit further if the parent does find this out that their child is a DL there are pros and cons on how to deal with it. The fact is a diaper is just a different kind of underwear. I am one who sees no harm in allowing the child to wear diapers in moderation. From what I've read about trying to stop it can lead to much worse problems. A good parent will weigh the situation and make the right choice.
When thinking about this just a slight bit further some babies cling to a blanket a teddy bear or some other transitional object as a form of security when the mother is not around or in sight, as a way of maintaining that bond. What better object would there be in reality than the diaper what other item would the mother have more contact with than a diaper. If you ask me that’s a pretty smart little baby. Consider this too how many little kids do you see carrying a blanket or teddy bear around long after they are out of diapers. There are even many girls especially, who have stuffed animals well into their teens and even into adulthood. But no one thinks anything about that. Interesting isn’t it?

Nov 12, 2015
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im sorry and well done for how you handled it
by: Anonymous

I'm sorry to see that, a boy so young that has that, I am whats called an adult baby and I have a fettish, you have handled it so well and I don't think you could have handled it better. I wish my mum was the same. When I was young a lot of bad things happened to me and I have learned that I looked for guidance love and support elsewere because I didn't get much from my mum, I did get it from my brother at a young age but we was also experimenting which can sometimes happen pretending to be babies etc, and that's how I grew up with this fettish, i'm not saying anything bad has happened to your son it may be completely wrong but is there anything that may have happened that your son was stressed about, maybe bullying or teasing, did he have accidents like wetting the bed. Your son maybe finding a little comfort from them but can I also sugest something that a sexual therapist told me. Now obviously my suggestion is not to do with sex its to do with finding comfort, apart from wearing diapers ask him to think of something that makes him feel really happy and get him to keep thinking it, close his eyes and let him drift away. It could be like building sandcastles or playing in the park but something that really makes him happy, like when harry potter had to think of something when conjuring up a patronus charm, LOL sorry lame example but that might just help, i'm not a psychologist by the way I was googling diaper fetishes and I seen this as a heading and just had to check because its so sad but I am giving my experience.

Jan 03, 2015
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teen daughters diaper fetish
by: mary

My daughter is 16 and has a fetish for cloth diapers and rubberpants-[plastic pants].she got the fetish 2 years ago at age 14 when she finially made her First holy communion with the 7 year olds and per the parish dress code,had to wear the communion dress and veil with white tights and shoes and a cloth diaper and the rubberpants under the tights.she liked wearing them and the feeling they gave her of being like a baby for her first communion.after that,she started wearing the diaper and rubberpants around the house and to mass on sundays and for easter,etc.she asked me to buy her more cloth diapers and rubberpants and i did figuring she would get out of the fad soon.it has now been two years and she still wears them and loves to cuddle with dad in her diapers and rubberpants and pajamas.she is a great daughter otherwise!

Nov 02, 2014
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wow! diapers are better than sex
by: Anonymous

i too love the pleasures of cloth diapers.
it must be some psychological nexus to pleasures and sexual reinforcement.

Feb 08, 2014
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9 yr old with diaper /nappy Fetish Reply
by: Anonymous

I have done a study into the wearing of diapers and it seems to start at any age with me it started at puberty it seems to come and go as you said that the urge to wear them is so great a lot of people just give into it In my experience I feel that it could well be a cross between a fetish and OCD Obsessive compulsive Disorder as if you fight the inner feelings they will go away but they come back even stronger as an adult whom is the same as your son it is a form of relaxation against stress !although mine is for Plastic pants and diapers I do not defecate in them or urinate in them I just have an urge to wear such apparel I don't wear them out or at work my wife is ok about it ! although she does not have any desire to wear such apparel In the early days I did see a psychiatrist and he told me if it's not hurting anyone and your spouse is ok with it then why not utilize it!.

If it troubles him then obviously seek help And I am really glad that you and your husband are so understanding some parents are not! and will punish the child and make them wear them all the time that is wrong !. understanding is the order of the day Experts don't really know why this Phenomenon happens I don't really Know it is Just a Theory!I have ! about the subject after many years of talking to people whom have this!. Best wishes and Thanks for being understanding to your child! due to privacy I am afraid I have to remain anonymous but I am Married and have grown up children!

May 05, 2013
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another perspective
by: Anonymous

I've been dealing w/ this for a few decades as well. I recall feeling shame about diapers & wanting them from 6 or 7 through my teen years. Improvised a couple of times, bought disposables once. After fighting it for so long, and eventually getting online, I found the early online communties & information/resouces. I bought/threw out a couple hundred dollars worth, in a shame/binge-purge (supplies) & fear of being caught. Then, living on my own, I decided to stock up & use whenever I was at home.(evenings & all weekend) I did it to 1) see if I was AB or DL and 2) listen to what need was being met, and see if there were attached memories may have been attached. It was helpful; I got tired of AB related, but DL has carried / maintained it's attached meaning. It comes & goes, and I allow it, with discretion, when I feel like I emotionally 'neeed' it.
Another thing that subsides the feelings is having some meaningful socializaion; I could be 2 days into wearing, but after an evening w/friends or acquaintances, I find that I don't want/need to that night.
some instrospection: itemize what's the real object / source, the 'place' within that'd not being met, and perhaps, once in a while, indulge/allow this,as/ while the underlying issues are addressed.
Ifigure that at some point, it'll not carry much meaning & there'll be no need for it.
So perhaps engaging in life-filling opptys may feed the real need..

Oct 11, 2010
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Diaper Fetish
by: Anonymous

Like your son I too have had a diaper fetish since I was about 5 years old.

I can't think of what may have caused it only that when I was growing up in the mid 60's it was a matter of pride for a mother to have their kids out of diapers before age 2. I seemed to remember not liking the idea of going to bed without my diapers and plastic pants (disposable diapers were not yet popular). I remember feeling different without them. When I was 5 years old I stumbled on a box marked "baby clothes" hidden in our basement. I looked inside and saw about 3 dozen cloth diapers and every size and style of plastic pants, baby bottles and even a couple of pacifiers. I remember my penis got stiff looking at the plastic pants. Of course I didn't know what sex was at that age but I definitely had an erection. I took 4 diapers and a pair of plastic pants and hid them in the back of my closet.

When everyone went to bed for the night I would quietly stuff the diapers down my underpants and pull the plastic pants over them. It made me tremble because of the adrenalin rush I got from doing something taboo. It was a this time I discovered masturbation. For whatever reason I started masturbating in the prone position with my hands in between my legs and bear down aganst my mattress. After a lot of heavy breathing and sweating I would achieve what I can only describe as an orgasm. I would get this pleasurable feeling that started in my prostate and spread through my body causing me to get sleepy. As I grew older i felt like a freak or wierdo for liking diapers and thought I was the only one in the world who had these desires. Because it was the 70's way before the internet i had no one to talk to about this. I just kept thinking about diapers and fantasizing over them. It wasn't until I was 13 years old when I accidentally found out my best friend also had a diaper fetish. This had to be a one in a million chance to meet someone else your own age with the same fetish and be able to talk about it and share our fetish with each other.

Through the years (before the internet) I had met two other boys and one girl who shared the same fetish. It wasn't until the advent of the internet that I discovered there were alot of us who shared the same desires.

Point is your son should feel very lucky to have a parent like yourself who isn't judgemental.

I don't think your son needs help, just guidance.

So strong is this fetish you will not be able to stop it. When he reaches puberty it will no doubt turn sexual if he indeed has a diaper fetish. It may ebven progress to the point he may begin wetting or messing in diapers. As long as this is something he does in private I would again say not to worry. If he enjoys you treating him like a baby in the meantime you may as well enjoy your baby for a few more years while you still can.


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